Horse and Barn

Late one afternoon during one of my "fly-by" visits in the very early fall of '77, my Dad said to me, "Let's go for a drive…" We passed by pastures and farms, many miles away from "home" the two of us. I curiously wondered aloud "Where are we going?" "I'll show you, I'll show you…" he excitedly replied. Soon, we were on a gravel road across from a large, run down barn and a pasture with two horses grazing along the fence line…

"I'm thinking of buying this place," Dad said. He eagerly walked out plots on the land; "The house can go right here, and the barn's already there… It just needs a little fixing up. In addition, we're going to fence the whole place… I've always dreamt of a place just like this… Room for a couple of horses and a home… A place like this, out in the country…"

When my Dad passed away in October of 1977, within 30 days of that afternoon drive, I was devastated. In a very short period, we had grown very close. Dad's death was a major turning point in my life. Something inside of me changed, and although I was not sure what, I knew that I could no longer live my life under ordinary conditions. I had to search; I had to look for answers. I had to try to live my life, in order to do justice to his… During those days of grieving, I was very much alone. There were the ones who tried to comfort me, made me laugh and give me love. Yet, nothing could ever replace the memory of our last ride together, Dad, and I….

Some thirty years after his death, I came upon this place, and I started to cry. This was the place he'd imagined…. "A couple of horses and a barn…". Yet, this "place" I found, was a strong 500 miles away.

In five short years, I was given a gift in which I had the opportunity to not only get to know my father, but to love him, and understand the love he had for me. Some people never get to experience that kind of love in their life. This scene reminds me of my Dad, and his dreams, which became my own… Just "A couple of horses and a barn…"